After my series on divorce a few weeks ago (catch up here, here, here, here, and here), I’ve gotten several questions from parents asking me which books I’d recommend to help their kids better understand the process of divorce.
Reading a book about divorce together can be a great way to help your child comprehend what divorce is and how to deal with it. Books can help you find the right words to use to explain things to your child. Books can also be comforting for children, who can return to them again and again as they need to. I’d definitely recommend reading these together, even if your child can read alone, and giving them opportunities to ask as many questions as they want about the book.
Here are my five favorite books about divorce to read with your kids:
It’s Not Your Fault, Koko Bear
By Vicky Lansky
Amazon description: “This easy-to-understand children’s story and parenting guide is intended for families where both parents plan to stay active and involved in their child’s life. “It’s Not Your Fault, KoKo Bear” revolves around a lovable bear who doesn’t want to have two homes. KoKo’s experience will help children learn what divorce means, how family life will change, and understand that the divorce is not their fault.”
Best for: Elementary school kids who are asking questions and feeling worried or upset about the divorce. This is the book I end up using in therapy with kids most often.
Two Homes
By Claire Masurel and Kady MacDonald Denton
Amazon description: “At Mommy’s house, Alex has a soft chair. At Daddy’s house, Alex has a rocking chair. In each home, Alex also has a special bedroom and lots of friends to play with. But whether Alex is with Mommy or with Daddy, one thing always stays the same – Alex is loved. The gently reassuring text focuses on what is gained rather than what is lost when parents divorce, while the sensitive illustrations, depicting two unique homes in all their small details, firmly establish Alex’s place in both of them. Two Homes will help children – and parents – embrace even the most difficult of changes with an open and optimistic heart.”
Best for: Preschool aged kids who may not understand and/or don’t seem too upset by the idea of divorce.
Standing on My Own Two Feet
By Tamara Schmitz
Amazon Description: Addison is a regular kid whose parents are going through a divorce, but he knows that no matter what happens, his parents will always love him. The text in this beautifully illustrated picture book is inspiring, gentle, and uplifting, and teaches kids that having two homes to live in can be just as great as having two strong feet to stand on.
Best For: Kids who may think or feel the divorce is their fault or who need reassuring that both parents still love them.
Mama and Daddy Bear’s Divorce
By Cornelia Maude Spelman and Kathy Parkinson
Amazon Description: One sad day, Mama and Daddy Bear say they are getting a divorce. Daddy won’t live at home anymore. Dinah is scared and sad. She wonders if she’ll ever see Daddy again.
Best for: Kids whose parents aren’t going to be equally involved after the divorce.
The Invisible String
By Patrice Karst
Amazon Description: “Specifically written to address children’s fear of being apart from the ones they love, The Invisible String delivers a particularly compelling message in today’s uncertain times that though we may be separated from the ones we care for, whether through anger, or distance or even death, love is the unending connection that binds us all, and, by extension, ultimately binds every person on the planet to everyone else. Parents and children everywhere who are looking for reassurance and reaffirmation of the transcendent power of love, to bind, connect and comfort us through those inevitable times when life challenges us!”
Best for: Kids who are really missing one parent while at the other parents’ house. This book isn’t actually about divorce, but rather being away from loved ones.
If you’ve read any of these, I’d love to hear what you thought! Also, I’m sure I’m missing some great books that are out there! What kids’ books about divorce would you recommend?